Thursday, November 5, 2009

That Old Familiar Pain



Blue Eyes and I went to see a movie (finally) over the weekend that came highly recommended. The movie was called Bright Star.

The movie was about the unrequited love of a young couple.
He was the famous poet John Keats and her name was Fanny Brawne.
Blue Eyes loved it. I typically enjoy English period pieces but this one was more than I could handle. It was much too slow and it had too many dead scenes where nothing happened. I almost fell asleep at one point. Naturally it had a lot of old English poetry. I came away thinking that I really don't have an appreciation for poetry. I just don't get it. That was Friday night.

I was thinking about this all weekend and I came to question my dislike of poetry. If lyrics to a song is considered poetry (is it?), then I really do have an appreciation for this art. A well constructed set of lyrics can be just as powerful as a poem. I would argue even more powerful. Maybe I'm just getting old but they just don't write 'em like they use to. My favorite songwriters are old school: Jackson Browne, Paul Simon, Don Henley, James Taylor and Bruce Springsteen's early work (I don't care much for his new stuff).

Dan Folgelberg wrote a visual masterpiece back in 1981 called
Same Old Lang Syne
.
Lyrically, in my opinion, it's his best song.
The song is about a serendipitous meeting of old lovers in a grocery store on Christmas Eve.
It's written in such a way that you feel like you're right there.
The song contains four verses and a chorus.

The first two verses describe their initial meeting inside the store and their joy at seeing each other again. The third verse touches on their current situations: she's married and he's on the road as a successful musician. The last verse is their goodbye but it's the final few lines of the song that have always stuck with me:

Just for a moment i was back at school
And felt that old familiar pain
And as i turned to make my way back home
The snow turned into rain --

I've always wondered what that old familiar pain was.
Was it their breakup?
The emotional roller coaster in their relationship?
Was it the cancerous jealously and uncertainty?
Was it their never ending and ongoing arguments?

They say that our minds tend to remember the goods things that have happened in our lifetime. I know that's the case with me. Whether it be childhood memories, past relationships or events, I tend to recall them with rose-coloured glasses. I wonder why that is.
Having said that, every once in a while an "old familiar pain" rears it's ugly head.
Last week I had a dream where one of my old pains replayed itself in slow motion (like dreams usually do). I woke up emotionally drained and depressed. It was a pain I thought I had buried long ago. Why is it that physical wounds heal so much quicker and cleaner than the other kind?

Towards the end of the movie there's a scene where Fanny is dealt a terrible pain.
It's a very powerful scene where the pain is so intense it drives her to her knees as she emotionally breaks down.
And maybe there's the answer to my question.

1 comment:

Vicki said...

Love, love, love Dan Fogelberg!